Unreal drunk-dials a PR flack, checks in on a depressed local blogger and gets schooled at sexy semiotics

1) Red Lobster — I love almost everything at Red Lobster — lobster tail, crab legs, coconut shrimp, crab fettuccini alfredo and, of course, their Cheddar Bay Biscuits!

2) Waffle House — Their pecan waffles are the best, and I love their hashbrowns — scattered, smothered and covered (scattered on the grill, smothered with onions and covered with cheese).

3) TGI Friday's — Their Bloody Mary's are the best, IMO. As for food — right now I'm digging their Parmesan Crusted Chicken. Of course, they were probably discontinue it just because I like it so much. And for dessert — those little cinnamon sugar donuts they bring hot to your table with the icing for dipping — YUM — (side note: I am going here for lunch today with some friends from work!)

4) Qdoba — I always order their Three Cheese Nachos with Beef. About six months ago, I was eating them every single week because every time I made a trip to C'ville to pick up/drop off the girls for weekend visitation with their (asshole) father, we would go there. (Hmmm... and I was wondering how I gained weight.) Qdoba has spoiled me rotten — I will never eat that crap at Taco Bell again.

5) Fazolli's — This is a Monday night staple at my house because I usually go through the drive-thru and pick up dinner on my way home on Monday nights. I always get their baked spaghetti and I think their breadsticks beat Olive Garden's hands-down any day.

6) Cracker Barrel — Since my Mom doesn't make Chicken & Dumplins anymore, I have to go here to get my Chicken & Dumplin fix. They are as good as Mom's (shhh... don't tell her that).

Know of an Unreal-worthy local blog? Send the URL to unreal@riverfronttimes.com