Review: Sinse's Rainbow Belts Strain Underwhelms With a Lack of Flavor

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TOMMY CHIMS

Sure, it looks good, but the taste just isn't there.

A long time ago, I had a friend who started growing cannabis.

They went all-in on the space, the equipment and genetics. After visiting throughout the grow cycle, it was all very exciting to see and smell some fantastic plants. I thought we'd be on easy street once harvest time rolled around. But after the plants were cut down and dried, the weed was not loud at all. It was quieter than a library.

All the smells I experienced when helping trim were nowhere to be found. It smoked like a Marlboro Ultra Light. All the wind in my friend's sails disappeared. It was akin to painting a masterpiece, only to have the paint disappear while it dries. Experiencing that heartbreak in the past doesn't prevent heartbreak in the future. But you gotta put yourself out there still to experience that tasty smoke again.

One strain that has been catching my eye within the weed community lately has been Rainbow Belts. A cross between Moonbow and Zkittlez originally bred by Archive Seed Bank, Rainbow Belts has seemingly been a low-key favorite for cannabis connoisseurs since it was created due to its "Z terp" qualities. This seemed like a slam dunk for terps, which I'm here for all day every day.

I procured an eighth of Sinse's Rainbow Belts at the Ellisville Swade location. This is the furthest west I've been to get to a dispensary, as most are inside of the inner belt. On my drive I passed multiple police cars — Ellisville doesn't play. After being ushered into the patient area after checking in, I was briefed on some options, but I knew what I came out to the county to get. I paid $30.20 after tax for the eighth due to a sale, and the flower tested at 25.79 percent THC.

When I ripped the mylar bag open, I got three large nuggets of the Belts, several stems and no smells whatsoever coming out of the bag. The flower and orange hairs hugged to the stems tightly. My initial thought was that it seemed very underwhelming, and after smoking the first joint, it turns out that first impression was an accurate assessment. I had a mild head high and a medium-plus body high, but there were no vibrant terpenes dancing across my tongue when I inhaled.

The second smoke was just as forgettable as the first session. The effect was similar to the first experience; once again, the terpenes were nowhere to be found. Normally I'm one to get excited about being paid to smoke and write about weed, but there was zero motivation to keep smoking this stuff after the second joint. As Cypress Hill once said, "It's a fun job, but it's still a job."

I tried to make the Rainbow Belts more palatable. I attempted to revive the nugs in a jar with a small humidity pack. I was using great rolling papers (Team Element, baby), and I even picked up the hot new joint-rolling accessory: the Rip Tip. I did everything in my power possible to make this weed taste good, meeting Sinse halfway like I was dropping acid at a Phish concert.

I rolled up all the remaining Rainbow Belts into a large joint, and prepared to light it like a Viking funeral pyre. As I begrudgingly smoked down the flavorless joint after a great dinner with friends, I wished to the weed deities that the next batch would be better and more dialed in. Sinse, please turn the volume up on the Rainbow Belts so it's loud AF. Missouri's medical patients and the soon-to-be recreational market deserve better.