Missouri Police Warn Citizens Not to Wrestle Bear

If there's any of you left, you could wind up in jail

May 31, 2023 at 11:46 am

If you wrestle a bear in Missouri, the consequences could be even worse than getting mauled half-to-death a la Leonardo DiCaprio in The Revenant. That's right, scuffle with a bear in the Show-Me State and you could be grappling with a misdemeanor.

The Salem Police Department on the edge of the Mark Twain National Forest reminded everyone of that actual state law on the books yesterday when a Salem resident spotted a black bear near Rolla Road on the northern edge of town.

The department wrote on Facebook, "If you see or encounter a bear please notify the Police Department, do not try and feed or interact with the bear."

And by "interact" with the bear, the Salem police mean especially not to wrestle (or for that matter even wrastle) the creature.

Not only is wrestling a bear that can weigh as much as 660 pounds a bad idea on its own merits, it's also expressly forbidden by law.

In fact, you'll be breaking Missouri's bear wrestling law if you do any of the following: wrestle a bear; permit bear wrestling on premises under your control; promote, conduct, or stage bear wrestling; advertise bear wrestling; collect admissions for bear wrestling; purchase, sell or possess a bear which you know will be used for bear wrestling; train a bear for bear wrestling; subject a bear to surgical alteration for bear wrestling.

There is apparently a long history of humans wrestling bears, which may explain why the phrasing of those infractions is so oddly specific. The offenses are all considered class A misdemeanors.

As for the bear in Salem, rest assured there was no wrestling or promotion of wrestling of any sort. The Salem PD says they "closely monitored the situation and the bear was last seen heading North back out of town."